Hello Readers, Today I am going o be showing you my writing about me jumping off a skyscraper. I felt proud of my writing because it creates what I am doing with my picture. I had show what I am feeling not tell what I am feeling here is my writing.
SHOW, DON'T TELL
In a beautiful city called England on a bright sunny day, I was jumping off a skyscraper smiling.
My feet were a bit shaky. My heart was beating fast. My hands were ready to go.
My shoulders were up and my arms were ready to go down… down… down.
My mind was thinking I’m Finally free. My eyes were nearly closed.
When I got down on the floor my heart was beating slower and slower and slower.
My heart was calm. I wanted to jump off a higher skyscraper tower but then I thought not to.
When I was up on the skyscraper I saw a lot of people looking at me.
They were so tiny from up where I was. I could hear people screaming
“DON'T JUMP OFF DON'T JUMP OFF!” But I did not listen.
I could feel tickles in my legs. I felt like I was flying like a bird up in
the air but going down to the ground. I also felt like I was the world's
greatest jumper. My favourite part about it was jumping off the skyscraper.
There was a bush down below the skyscraper and I thought I was going to land in there but I did not. I thought to myself is this a dream, but nope it wasn't.
hi angel I like your story and the show don't tell was spot on. could you tell us were you landed from the skyscraper. how did you get to the top of the skyscraper?
ReplyDeleteHi Angel, A very nice piece of writing, A lot of information to absorb and think about. I read through it several times to get my head around it.
ReplyDeleteDon't try that at home.
Love from Grandma and Grandad.